It’s in Iraqi Ice Cream, Condi

I rarely comment on current affairs, because it’s just so depressing.  But this was too grimly amusing to pass up:

[B]y all reports, President Bush is more utterly convinced than ever of his righteousness. Friends of his from Texas were shocked recently to find him nearly wild-eyed, thumping himself on the chest three times while he repeated "I am the president!" He also made it clear he was setting Iraq up so his successor could not get out of "our country’s destiny."

Let us hope a dialogue like this doesn’t take place in the White House soon:

President Bush: "Do you realize that in addition to fluoridating water, why, there are studies underway to fluoridate salt, flour, fruit juices, soup, sugar, milk, ice cream? Ice cream, Condi? Children’s ice cream!…You know when fluoridation began?…1946. 1946, Condi. How does that coincide with your post-war Islamofascist conspiracy, huh? It’s incredibly obvious, isn’t it? A foreign substance is introduced into our precious bodily fluids without the knowledge of the individual, and certainly without any choice.

That’s the way your hard-core Jihadi works. I first became aware of it, Condi, during the physical act of love…Yes, a profound sense of fatigue, a feeling of emptiness followed. Luckily I was able to interpret these feelings correctly. Loss of essence. I can assure you it has not recurred, Condi. Women…women sense my power, and they seek the life essence. I do not avoid women, Condi…but I do deny them my essence."

4 thoughts on “It’s in Iraqi Ice Cream, Condi

  1. I hope someone has told the real Jack D. Rippers, Buck Turgidsons and Merkin Muffleys in Washington that the era of U.S. nuclear primacy has begun (see Foreign Affairs March/April 2006), so it’s now possible for the United States to destroy the long-range nuclear arsenals of Russia or China with a first strike. I’m pretty sure Putin at least knows it very well.

  2. Right, so let’s hope that the alleged affair with Canada’s Minister of Foreign Affairs Peter MacKay doesn’t draw off her attention too much.

    BTW, her book “Germany Unified and Europe Transformed. A Study in Statecraft”, co-authored with Philip D. Zelikow, is one of the most brilliant books about the end of the Cold War and the German unification I ever read.

  3. Speaking of stealing bodily essences, the Washington Post reports this:

    “[German]” police and prosecutors have surreptitiously acquired scent samples of some protest organizers to make it easier for police dogs to locate them in a crowd, authorities have acknowledged. The technique was pioneered by the Stasi, the East German secret police.”

    It’s part of the “hardline” the Post says Germany’s right wing government is taking towards protests against the G-8. It also underscores a point lost amidst the sanquine analysis of European presidential politics posted here, according to which right wing executives end up governing from the left, so no need to worry. The right clearly intends to put property in there with liberty, egality and fraternity, and its political triumphs are due in part to express intentions to use the police force to resolve social conflicts this causes. You can bet Mssr. Sarkozy has similar plans for the Spring.

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