Sorry for the blog hiatus. I was visiting folks in Texas for a few weeks, but now I'm back in Germany, enjoying the glorious weather.
Let me give you the idea of the shit people deal with in Texas, and why I'm glad to be back in Germany.
First, a German insect problem. A parcel deliveryman in Krefeld, Germany recently had to be hospitalized after he stepped in an underground wasps' nest and was stung fifteen (15) times. They actually cordoned off the area (!) and called the city 'pest control' team out:
Before they could let the pest control guy into the Danger Zone™ to kill the beasts, they called up the Krefeld City Environmental Office to make sure the wasps weren't endangered (!). They weren't, so they died.
Now, a Texas insect problem:
A North Texas woman is recovering following an attack from a swarm of bees that killed her two horses….
Kristen Beauregard told NBC 5 she was working with Chip, her prize miniature horse, in the backyard when — unprovoked — thousands of bees swarmed her and the horse. The insects are suspected to be Africanized bees.
The pain from the stings was like being stabbed with hundreds of knives and torched with a flamethrower at the same time, she said. She still has some visible welts on her eyelids from the attack.
Chip quickly became covered with bees and began thrashing wildly around the yard in pain, she said.
She and the horse both jumped into the backyard swimming pool in an effort to escape the bees, but even that provided little relief. The bees hovered above the water and stung Beauregard's face when she would come up for air, she said…. Both horses died.
Beauregard, whom paramedics estimate was stung approximately 200 times, praised the efforts of the emergency crews who risked their lives in an effort to save her and her animals.
A beekeeper removed on Thursday the approximately 6-foot-tall beehive that was home to an estimated 30,000 bees. It was located in a shed about 30 yards from the scene of the initial attack.
It's a shame for the poor delivery guy, but the average Texan gets stung 15 times every trip to the outhouse.
My safe, pleasant, boring, beautiful Germany — thank you for taking me back into your passionless arms!